Relationship Short Notes :- Your Eyes

Are you the kind of person who just goes for whatever and whoever you want? Are you the person who regardless of the circumstances will approach a man/woman or plot to have a man/woman without restraint? If all this while you have made moves like this and it has ended up in your unhappiness. It may be time to change your heart on certain things. Too many people think that manipulating circumstances and people most especially the opposite sex is something that has no consequence. Don’t let this assumption make you careless. Your Lusts can and will lead you to someone worse off in heart than you think….


All things said with Love and Respect
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Your Relationship & Honesty

“We never know the power of a lie until the truth comes” –@MrVitoSpeaks

Human beings cannot be faulted for believing what other people tell them. Words are designed to form and inform, inspire and break down complicated things.
The problem in most situations is when a human being abuses the trust they are honoured with and make people believe in a lie for personal gain or covering up an action that they should take responsibility for openly.
Have you ever made a decision based on someone’s convincing lie? How often do you feel like a fool when the truth comes? It happens everyday, people lie or omit the truth or neglect a crucial area of information which would complete the truth and help you , all this is in order to look good but the truth comes out and then everything ever said before is questioned. Trust is abused often, and what may have taken years to build is lost in a matter of minutes.

That being said there are some things I find integral to any kind of relationship surviving the tests of depraved human lies. I believe this is beneficial to the love relationship.


Honesty:- Show me a situation that is void of the crucial truth and it is likely that the demise of that situation, institution, relationship is imminent.
When you are in a relationship and it is not founded on honesty, the lies will eventually crumble under the immense weight of Genuine responsibility. Honesty is a foundational element of all your interactions. Lies are like Dynamite sticks in a cave they are hidden from plain sight, however when they blow up everything in that cave will come crashing down. So part of your personal development should be in getting use to being honest and also taking responsibility for the dumb things you do before the truth comes and destroys the things that you should actually be treasuring as much as you do your self.

Please understand that a legacy built on dishonesty will eventually be undone even if it out lasted the generation in which it was told.

In the advent of Love:- Remember that when Love is on the cards you and that other person are mutually responsible for the things that you say and do in the foundation of your love. Recognise that all that you say, or don’t say can come into play months or even years into the relationship.
So Honesty about everything should be the policy.
It promotes that kind of Adam and Eve Nakedness, just don’t let the cunning serpent make you lie to your partner. 😉

All things said with Love and Respect
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Relationship Notes:- Visual Relationship DeTox 4 Women


If every good woman I know wants to be a wife in charge of her household then I prefer to be honest and frank. I want to see all the beautiful women I know loved and cherished. -@MrVitoSpeaks

In all fairness, what you are preparing for when you talk about being a wife is not just a role you watch on TV, its a defining role that isn’t for actors. Its for brave women ready to step up to the plate. There is no use in idealising being a wife and not doing the prep to connect to the Right man. A good man can make the difference between heaven & hell or particularly a woman happy or a woman scorned! Although my advice to clear up your mind vision may sound extreme, I’m going to require you to change your eyes, if not your glasses. (Brace Yourselves)


Throw out or box or Delete:
a) DVDs that strongly influence your ideas on love. Especially, sexually driven films/dramas. (Is the Love you see there, the love you have had in real life?)

b) Tabloid Magazines about Celebrity Love, Love Novels that contain graphic depictions of sexual activity and any kind of promiscuity. (I’m Single Handedly ruining your Lifestyle here)

c) Photos of Half Naked sexualized men on your laptop and phones. i.e Airbrushed “Perfect Men”

d) Get rid of the Ex boyfriends in every single way you can imagine, delete phone numbers, BBMs, WhatsApps, Pictures, Naked Pictures. DELETE DELETE DELETE. Certain memories keep giving you strength to return to your vomit.

I’m not saying you should abandon entertainment altogether, but I’m saying move from addiction to responsible management. This involves breaking away and doing without it for as long as you can without relapsing-@MrVitoSpeaks

I say this in respect to the female heart. These things are known to poison your genuine and right ideas of Love. You need to reset your mind for fruitful love and that will not happen whilst watching “Scandal”, “Real Housewives of Anywhere” or “Love and Hip Hop” or “Porn”.

What you think is reality is really someone’s entertaining edited glossed version of situations and some of them staged conveniently for “Drama” and “Arousal”. -@MrVitoSpeaks

When you think your life is filmed in HD you stop actually interacting and live like what you fantasise. Fascinated by appearance but never stopping to investigate what you think “IDEAL” is in reality.

The truth is you need to engage in some habit changing wholesome conversations, reading, socialising with Genuine People & Couples. To be a wife is a royal thing. You don’t become royalty by watching people entertain you.

You become royalty by pursuing your purpose and doing it passionately. -@MrVitoSpeaks

By working with the man you love towards a greater goal than your “Exhaulted Ego” “Exhaulted Beauty” and “Awards”. Being a wife isn’t about entertainment but it is full of entertaining moments.

That charm you pull off so well on social networking sometimes only works on the internet. It may get you into a mans bed but after that you wont be allowed into his head. -@MrVitoSpeaks

That being said I may sound like a man on a mission to transform you or at least spark a thought. All I ask is that you think about this and manage your intake of addictive media. A clear mind is the first sign post to locating the Love that you need to be the best version of you.

It was an ordinary weekday morning when Caroline first noticed how much pornography was taking over her life. With 15 minutes to go before she was due to leave for a job interview, she opened up her laptop to print off an extra copy of her CV and there, onscreen, was a grab she’d saved from a porn site.

“I remember the feeling of being sucked in, really wanting that two-minute fix, that numbness I got when I used porn,” says Caroline. “I was stressed out, and I risked being late for my interview, but I pressed play anyway and fast-forwarded it to the bit I wanted. It took two minutes.” But the relief was to be short-lived. “Afterwards I just hated myself for giving in and getting off on images that treated women like pieces of meat. But I kept going back.” -Guardian Article

If you would like to know what to do from this point check out what my wife has to say.


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10 Ways To Find A Good Man


10 Ways To Find A Good Man

1) Stop falling in lust with and sleeping with “Bad” Men. Don’t give them what they don’t deserve to satisfy your feelings.

2) Stop Respecting and Rewarding bad or rebellious behavior in men who behave like boys. It makes bad men look good and good men look unattractive in your mind.

3) Accept that your eyes have deceived you in the past. Bad men all have something in common that you like. Stop liking that thing as a prerequisite. Reorder the List. Heart first then outward man.

4) Don’t hang around with friends that guys only want to sleep with but never want to commit to. Acquaintances rub off on you and your reputation.

5) Practice what you preach. Nothing more difficult to deal with than a woman who pretends to be someone she is not.


6) Your Faith & Character, not your lusts should determine your expectations. A good man wants a woman he can dream with and fulfill destiny with.

7) Tell all good men around you that you respect their attempts at living a life of purpose. Be an encourager

8) Use your words as tools to connect people. A woman who hates people is usually very materialistic and that is unattractive.

9) Tell all men that like you that you respect honesty and you hate lies. Also that you’re not prepared to take a mixture of the two.

10) Forgive those who hurt you in the past. Let the damage heal through conversation, analysis, honesty, good friends, and read some books. Prepare for the right relationship with more attention and hope.

All things said with Love and Respect
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3 Things Influential People Can Do To Improve Personal Relationships

3 Things Influential People Can Do To Improve their Personal Relationships

1) Discuss “Commitment” with your partner openly.
The purpose of these discussions is really to remove ambiguity and mystery around the reasons for which you are committing to each other. Influential people need love and commitment to help keep sanity and balance in a very demanding world.

2) Go to conferences or Seminars together and where possible read together. If you’re looking to grow as a partnership, I advise attending meetings where mutual and joint learning can take place and a common knowledge base can be established. Learning never stops you have to commit to learning together it opens up the understanding and also builds a bond of shared experience that validates the relationship.

3) Utilize your talents for the sake of your relationships. Maybe you’re very intuitive or knowledgeable or discerning. When your partner is walking into danger or into really great opportunities be the one to encourage, warn and support them. Don’t be a yes partner, always saying yes knowing that something is not quite right be a discerning partner someone who looks out for your partners best interests and tries to ensure they are not cheated.
See yourself as your partners keeper.

Always remember Influence and relationships go hand in hand. Neglecting one in favor of the other does not do you good but understanding that both are required to progress in life is important.

All things said with Love and Respect
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12 Things You Can Do To Improve Your LIFE


12 Things You Can do To Change Your Life for the Better

Your life is your responsibility, I advise anyone who wants to be “Influential” to take these words with heart and prepare for personal change in order to live that Life of purpose.
I sincerely hope you can extract something good from here. This list of activities will challenge your self perception and also help you to discover how you can live a better life. No personal preparation for greatness should be rushed through, it’s a gradual ride to that spot of understanding. Learn as much as you can.

1) Seek to know & understand your purpose and count the cost required to build what you have dreamt of.

2) Don’t give your body to strangers, It’s simple but effective in building a stronger stable and sustainable character.

3) Analyse the effectiveness of your friendships based on their truthfulness not just how you “feel” about them.

4) Get a good education if you haven’t got one already, a smart woman/man is attractive and great company all around.

5) Never allow bitterness, envy, jealousy have their way with your most priceless qualities.

6) If you don’t understand something or someone, ask questions that will empower you to make well informed decisions.

7) Never be ashamed to admit how you feel but be wise as to whom you share those feelings with.

8) Stop looking down on yourself, work on your confidence and boldly declare, and #ExcecuteYourHustle

9) Everything you are will become better if you consider Gods truth on everything.

10) DECIDE to move on from the foolishness of the past and let God renew your mind.

11) At least be honest enough to assess your desires and gauge what is “Fantasy” as well as what is “Faith”.

12) Before you start anything, never be scared to “In all your ways acknowledge Him, And He shall direct your paths. (Proverbs 3:6 NKJV)”

All things said with Love and Respect
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After The Break Up

Hi there, I trust that my thoughts find you feeling better or at least searching for some truth. Whatever the case this is me sharing with you a piece of the things I went through after my heartbreak. I share this only as a form of therapy so use it.


A Bad Break Up.

9 Thoughts/Feelings I Had

1) The Morning after you break up with some one you dated you wonder why you showed them so much of yourself.

2) You question their genuineness as you rush through all the memories you have, both good and bad. Rationalising the good and deeply hating the bad.

3) When you weigh the odds and realise it was a total waste of your life and resources, you get mad & angry! You regret giving freely many of the things they didn’t deserve.

4) If you revealed your body, you feel abused and even naked yet physically fully clothed.

5) You may even cry and go through all your moments of submission to that persons selfishness.

6) If you revealed your insecurities you feel mentally ashamed of yourself and may even pick through your insecurities blaming yourself for even being vulnerable.

7) If you revealed your emotions you feel inwardly naked because their words were your blanket and cover. You could be free with them and tell all.

8) The deeper end is the sins you were willing to commit because you “Loved or Lusted” after the person the guilt you felt then and some you still feel now.

9) The feeling of being robbed financially, emotionally, mentally and even socially by an ex.

I went through it all and today I stand up smiling because I started for once to take who I am seriously, I had to receive love again to help restore the things I lost. I had to work hard to get my money back and most of all my self respect. What I gave was not all of me but from me. It means I have plenty more to give to the right person when the time comes. They took all my best “presents” but did not take my future. They damaged my self esteem but they did not take my dream. Whatever the cost you had to pay to be the man or woman you are today, wake up and write the rest of the story! We could slump in pain, embarrassment, shame, poverty and even mental recurring curses or stand up and say……..

9 Thoughts, Statements & Commitments That Helped Restore Me

1) My “Love” will be refilled and I will be loved again.
2) I should continue to love, but with wisdom, knowledge, and real faith in the persons substance.
3) I will find the right one with out having to give my body away to seal the deal.
4) My good friends are not my enemies.
5) He/She broke my heart but I can keep it broken or ask God for Healing.
6) Trust is not hard to give & real love is not easy to keep.
7) Promiscuity is not healthy for anyone let alone a broken heart.
8) I won’t experience a rebound if my team are supporting me.
9) I will not make a relationship real until I know that It will help me become the man/woman I need to be for the dreams we both have.

The 10th that made me overcome…..

10) No body should have the power to destroy a life they did not create. My heart is a treasure that must be guarded with all diligence for out of it come the issues of life. I will be a better man through Gods help by the time I meet the right woman. my faith is my integrity, and love is my choice not a random act. Emotions are by-products of continuous nurturing.

With that said your questions are always welcome and help is available.

All things said with Love and Respect
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